We recently had the perfect stuntman trifecta: one cold blustery day, two boys, and an extra mattress in transit on the floor. The finishing touch is a buffet to use as a handle and some sweet music…neh neh STUNTMAN!!!!
One of my secret “talents” is hearing a song and completely mis-identifying the lyrics, inserting something that rhymes really well. After walking by my room as a child and hearing me singing, “The girl is a fan fire….”, my brother popped his head in asking, “What did you just say?” Nothing…of course. I quickly was dubbed “Vampire” when he informed me that the song began with, “The world is a vampire…” This was not an isolated incident
My boys benefit from my continued use of this skill.
One such song I always loved was “Stuntman.” At our house, flying leaps off of anything are accompanied by “Neh…neh…STUNTMAN!” and a little vocal faux-riff. When the opportunity for this living room stuntman jam presented itself, I instantly declared that we needed to find “Stuntman” on YouTube to help us rock out. I called up Pete, who is vastly knowledgeable about connecting what I’m attempting to sing to the actual song. He kept our momentum going by immediately identifying the song not as “Stuntman” but rather “Stroke Me” by Billy Squier. Of course. musicians and their enunciation.
I still have no idea what the song is about, but have been informed that it is not as wholesome as “Stuntman.” I have to agree with Eddie Izzard here that it’s 90% how you say it and only 10% what you say. I was well into my 20’s before it was pointed out to me that “Fat Bottomed Girls” was actually about fat bottomed girls rather than the erroneous connection I’d made in my head that it was somehow about flat bottomed something. Oh well, the music sure is catchy! *sigh* Disappointment followed the realization that I could no longer blare that song in the car near anything public.
Little Boy donned his blue stuntman cape and with the music cranked, we were rockin’. When it was time, I’d holler my theme song over Billy Squier, “neh neh STUNTMAN!” and they’d jump extra high.
After two rounds of that I pulled up one of the few rock songs that I correctly know the title to, “Paradise City” by Guns ‘n’ Roses. We didn’t even make it through that and Little Boy requested some “old songs like Papa used to listen to.” Onto the Beatles.
Once “Let It Be” started, we were back on. Climbing the filing cabinet to the buffet for the greatest stunt yet…he’s going for it…maybe…
Ohh, no…not today…it’s just too scary quite yet. That’s okay. Let it be.
I was awarded a reprieve before the time will come when I need to clear off the breakables from the buffet…
The next day the magic was gone. The mattresses continued their journey to their final destination as beds for the boys.
But for one evening, the stuntmen were airborne.